Eleven years sober is a precarious place because my reaction to most shares is to want to roll my eyes. I totally believe in all the 12 step programs, I just don’t like people much right now. That is pretty sad to me.
I felt on the verge of a panic attack for a few minutes. I forgot to take my a.m. Meds. I also feel that my allergies are causing mental problems.
Oh snap! Just got my period. A lot of the problem was PMS!
Sometimes I just forget. I forget how everything connects for me, and thus it all flies apart. So, I think my allergies and perimenopausal hormones are connected. I don’t care if “doctors” don’t. They have no idea how I actually feel, which is horrible. My gyno said that perimenopause is like have PMS all the time, and yet my old fart GP said essentially that was bullshit. I hate him. I’m going to change doctors. I’m also frustrated with the ND I went to, so I’m not returning to her. I did make an appt. with an allergy specialist at the local ENT clinic, but it’s not until the 16th and will probably only be about seasonal allergies, not including food allergies…
So we are switching cat litters, because the dust from the regular clay litters is making me hysterical. And we switched to a natural dishwashing tablet instead of the regular brand and its fumes! I seem to be becoming chemically sensitive right now. I can’t wait until it rains. We’ve been without rain very late this season. It’s forecasted for next weekend. We’ve also had at least 4 fires in the area, creating fire pollution in the air.
I’m trying to find a new space to move my office. My DH tore down the ceiling that was falling down in the closet and found not only inches of mold, but probable asbestos. Ew! Obviously this has to have contributed to my being sick.
mold
some of the rubble
asbestos
The building is from the 1900s, as evidenced by this lathe on the ceiling instead of drywall. Note how stained it is from mold. The maintenance man says they’ve known about this problem for at least 30 years. Our state has no law against mold, acc. to the Health Dept., but we kept a sample in case the asbestos is something they’d respond to.
So today we are going to the biggest AA mtg. of the week, partly so I can sell a ticket to a friend for the Gratitude Banquet we have in early November, but also because I might stay for the business meeting. There is a service position called Cooperation with the Professional Community. I would rather do this service at the District level, and will also try to go to their mtg. on the upcoming Tuesday.
Then we are going to go try to empty out our storage unit, which is a useless monthly bill. Ugh… that’s a fun task, not.
What I would rather do is stay in my pajamas all day.
